that's crazy talk. Porn online. Whatever. Next thing you're gonna tell me is that women can have orgasms.
THATS IT BOB! IT ALL ENDS NOW!!!
I CANT BELIEVE YOU USED SUCH HOLY GROUND TO AID YOUR PERVERTED MALE HUMOR!! im gonna have to sleep on this. no punishment is too harsh for you! when it comes to me, you better be bent over and waitin, braced against the wall cause it wont be the usual sundaygotomeeting dry ass fuck! im just glad i saw this post late and not live. u should be too!
anyway....now that i've calmed down, i just came in here to leave my thought for the day...which, by the way, might just be my next signature...so dont anyone steal it!
u know, how i'm all consumed with the whole masturbation thing.....
this one almost tops "masturbation is not a crime"
masturbation is only a sin when there's no one around to take the pics!
I CANT BELIEVE YOU USED SUCH HOLY GROUND TO AID YOUR PERVERTED MALE HUMOR!! im gonna have to sleep on this. no punishment is too harsh for you! when it comes to me, you better be bent over and waitin, braced against the wall cause it wont be the usual sundaygotomeeting dry ass fuck! im just glad i saw this post late and not live. u should be too!
I can't believe bob would say such a thing!
To teach him a lesson please post a boobie pic in my 411, conveniently located here.
me niether
but how bout:
"You will be aroused by a shampoo commercial" or
"You will invent a humorous toilet lid".
Have you been buying your Chinese fortune cookies from the factory next door to the crack house again? I thought you learned your lesson after you got the one that read, "Elevator smells different to a midget" You couldn't figure out if they were insulting you or enlightening you.
Have you been buying your Chinese fortune cookies from the factory next door to the crack house again? I thought you learned your lesson after you got the one that read, "Elevator smells different to a midget" You couldn't figure out if they were insulting you or enlightening you.
someone better throw a boobie pic in here cause the night crowd wont even know where to take this one..............
anyway....now that i've calmed down, i just came in here to leave my thought for the day...which, by the way, might just be my next signature...so dont anyone steal it!
u know, how i'm all consumed with the whole masturbation thing.....
this one almost tops "masturbation is not a crime"
masturbation is only a sin when there's no one around to take the pics!
i dont know. maybe u had to be there.
I was gonna steal it and use it for my own, but on second thought, if I used it, it would probably cause me more grief than anything.
I could be wrong but isn't when Homer starts writing fortunes for fortune cookies and Mr Burns searches for love on Flag Day after receiving the afformentioned fortune?
I could be wrong but isn't when Homer starts writing fortunes for fortune cookies and Mr Burns searches for love on Flag Day after receiving the afformentioned fortune?
I CANT BELIEVE YOU USED SUCH HOLY GROUND TO AID YOUR PERVERTED MALE HUMOR!! im gonna have to sleep on this. no punishment is too harsh for you! when it comes to me, you better be bent over and waitin, braced against the wall cause it wont be the usual sundaygotomeeting dry ass fuck! im just glad i saw this post late and not live. u should be too!
Bo, I'm sorry for using such holy ground to aid my perverted male humor. sometimes my id takes control.
I think the only way to keep me on track would be to post a pic of you orgasming while masturbating in my 411... (conveniently linked here). AFter all, it is a very wise and sexy woman who said...masturbation is only a sin when there's no one around to take the pics!
Bo, I'm sorry for using such holy ground to aid my perverted male humor. sometimes my id takes control.
I think the only way to keep me on track would be to post a pic of you orgasming while masturbating in my 411... (conveniently linked here). AFter all, it is a very wise and sexy woman who said...masturbation is only a sin when there's no one around to take the pics!
anyway....now that i've calmed down, i just came in here to leave my thought for the day...which, by the way, might just be my next signature...so dont anyone steal it!
u know, how i'm all consumed with the whole masturbation thing.....
this one almost tops "masturbation is not a crime"
masturbation is only a sin when there's no one around to take the pics!
i dont know. maybe u had to be there.
my thought for the day...
bo... if that's a sin, i'm more than willing to hear your confession. and i'm fairly sure you screaming "oh god, oh god" counts
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key
You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50
and your dreams are gone.
But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!
So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them."
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets,keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable,improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9 Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
10.Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key
You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50
and your dreams are gone.
But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!
So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them."
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets,keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable,improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9 Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
10.Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
that funny bastard came up with some wise words...especially since I will be "turning 30" in a few months
